Mike's Inspiration

I read Mike's blog, which inspired me to create a list like his without the categories. I thought this can't be that hard. Hours later...

100 Factoids About Me

1. I am surprisingly taller than some people.
2. I like to round up, even with numbers less than 5.
3. I have been married for 8 years.
4. Sometimes, my dog won’t come out of the closet.
5. I got kicked out of my college cafeteria for wearing pajama pants.
6. My mom hates how I dress when I travel.
7. I was the 4H Gift Wrapping Grand Champion. My box had leather fringe, and another had fish.
8. I love dance parties with 3 or fewer people.
9. I could lose my toenails at any moment.
10. My favorite place in the world is Barnes and Noble.
11. I rely on Caps Lock to do my capitalizing, which was a problem until I met James.
12. I toilet papered several friends’ houses.
13. I was the worst waitress Bob Evan’s ever saw.
14. I was a pretty bad document control specialist also.
15. I am afraid of disappointing people I barely know.
16. My parents love me and I love them.
17. I once ran into a bear in the wild.
18. Angels shared their water with my family.
19. I seem to spill paint and sprinkle glitter in every place I have ever lived in.
20. I can’t decide what political party I am most like.
21. Banana pancakes are my favorite.
22. My sister and I used to strap bicycle helmets on the day before the first day of school and ride a sled into the basement.
23. I hate conflict.
24. I have seriously entertained the thought of moving to San Diego and opening an ice cream parlor even though the only thing I know about running an ice cream parlor is how to eat ice cream.
25. Creativity is my favorite research interest at the moment.
26. Gifted students need advocates.
27. My favorite television comedy is the Big Bang Theory.
28. I go into mourning when football season ends.
29. I will always be a Steelers fan even when I move to San Diego.
30. My favorite drink is unfortunately Mountain Dew.
31. I love Kanye West’s music.
32. Strangely enough, I also love Taylor Swift, the Dixie Chicks, and Everclear.
33. I cheated in third grade on my 8’s multiplication quiz, but I confessed and learned that 8 x 6 = 48.
34. Four teeth that normally exist in peoples’ mouths never existed in mine.
35. I used to perm my bangs and not the rest of my hair.
36. I want to meet my Grandpa DaVia in heaven.
37. I believe in God and Jesus.
38. I remember too many of my dreams.
39. I learned over 2,000 words for the GREs and did not study for the quantitative part at all.
40. I am a pretty good water skier.
41. I hate going underwater.
42. I never had a Nintendo and still can’t keep up with a 6 year old.
43. I suck at test messaging.
44. My first kiss was at a cattle show.
45. I met my husband in an organic chemistry lab.
46. My first car was a Lebaron convertible, and it broke down a lot.
47. I got pulled over multiple times for forgetting to turn my headlights on.
48. I am a night person.
49. I have flat feet.
50. My picture is hanging in the world’s largest and finest high school field house.
51. I was in Nigeria during the September 11 attack.
52. I love playing games.
53. Even though I love independently owned restaurants, my favorite place to eat is still On the Border.
54. I pray for a dishwasher to magically appear in my kitchen.
55. My mom had to chase our cow down the street.
56. I accidentally called my dad a dildo.
57. It took me days to learn how to spell the word “purple.”
58. I am inspired by Ted.com.
59. Oatmeal chocolate chip cookies are another one of my favorites.
60. I don’t like edges unless I am on an airplane.
61. My parents didn’t believe me the Ojibwa was an Indian tribe because I had gotten so many other words messed up.
62. My favorite moments are when Watson, VJ, and I are cuddled on the couch with lots and lots of snow outside.
63. I like to explore, but I don’t like to be lost.
64. I didn’t take art classes because I was afraid I would get an A.
65. I actually love vacuuming, but only when there is a removable container I can watch debris get sucked into.
66. I wish I could always think of something funny to say.
67. Pool may be my worst sport, if it is a sport.
68. My biggest weakness is probably puppies.
69. I broke my thumb when I fell off stilts.
70. I honestly believe my NCAA bracket is going to win every year.
71. I am training for a half marathon with my dog.
72. Christmas is my favorite holiday season.
73. I think I am a Mac person.
74. I love ribbon.
75. I miss the places I used to live.
76. I love doing home improvement projects.
77. I accidentally electrocuted my husband.
78. My favorite bed is at the Weston.
79. I invented the “quicker zipper upper.”
80. I am the crazy person who sings at the top of her lungs in the car and pretends like she has tinted windows.
81. A male model once sat on my lap.
82. I would rather be freezing than sweating.
83. I wanted to be a farmer in first grade.
84. I used to create puppet shows for family entertainment.
85. I accidentally hit my mom and sister with a soft ball that was actually quite hard as evidenced by lace marks on their bodies.
86. I am extraordinarily claustrophobic and hate being in crowds.
87. I like to wear earrings.
88. I have unrealistic expectations.
89. I have always wanted to be on the Amazing Race.
90. I wish Arrested Development was still on television.
91. Paul Auster, John Steinbeck, William Faulkner, and C.S. Lewis are some of my favorite authors.
92. I believe Jell-O should never be considered a dessert.
93. Rice Krispie treats should be eaten for breakfast.
94. My paper airplane beat my students’.
95. I only like smushy hamburgers.
96. My happy place is a hot air balloon.
97. I feel slightly inadequate because I can’t open the jar of jalapeno peppers in the refrigerator.
98. This list has taken me two hours when I have a presentation tomorrow and two proposals due the next day.
99. A bird pooped on my dress on the way to a graduation party.

100. If you ever meet me, you would probably know all of this by our second hang out session.

It all started with the hiccups.

Hiccups are my new and very vocal arch nemesis.

I have an assignment that I need to complete for my instrument design course that requires my to utilize the MAP procedure. I am pretty sure it has nothing to with a navigational piece of paper or the dorm I once resided in at Grove City College. Somehow knowing what it is not, is not that helpful in running the procedure. Why do I not know what the Minimum Average Partial Procedure entails and how to run it on SPSS?

Hiccups.

Even when I keep my lips pursed together, some amount of noise escapes and my shoulders seem to twitch. It is hard to sit in class when this is happening. My solution was to excuse myself to get some water and take a brief walk. I missed 5 minutes, only 300 total seconds of class, and now I don't know how to run a MAPP.

Probably next I will fail the class, and you will find me at the nearest Bob Evans because even with my enemy in tow, I can always fall back on my waitressing career. Oh wait.

Lessons Learned

Within this last week of the semester, I have been doing a lot of learning. All of this learning has increased the amount of stress and reduced the amount of time for trivial things.

As it turns out, some were not that trivial. In the spirit of sharing knowledge for the good of humanity, Febreeze is not a perfect substitute for washing clothes especially if the clothes are still on one's body as it induces itching and wet spots that take a while to dry.

Scary Beauty

Chief Hudd, our campus safety hero, sends email reports of the crime on campus. These are quite helpful in heightening my senses and giving words to my wild imagination when I am walking to my car in the dark. The dark has always frightened me; I can remember retrieving frozen ravioli from the freezer in the basement. I would carefully and slowly tip toe, quietly to the freezer and grab the ravioli. Slam the freezer lid and make a run for it, sprinting up the stairs to safety.

This evening I was walking to my car when I heard rustling. I saw a flash of white about 20 feet from me. Are these silly college kids streaking again? Or, is there a lightening fast predator waiting to do things to me that Chief Hudd will have to report to the entire campus? I gripped my keys tight, ready to use them as a weapon if need be. (That is actually not true. You know how when you are super scared and you grab whoever is closest? Well my keys were closest.) I considered my options: A.) running back to the office that may be locked, B.) running to my car up hill, and C.) acting normally. Due to poor choice of shoes and two bags full of work, I chose C. (Maybe guys invented heels so that they could catch us, ladies.)

I kept walking. Then, I saw them. I saw their white tails flash and heard their rustling as they moved. I was within feet of such beautiful creatures. It was breath-taking. The male's antlers acted as an enchanting wand, creating a majestic moment.

Happy Birthday Yajeev!

Today is a very special day in the blogosphere. It is the renowned Yajeev's birthday! He turns 29 today and regains moral superiority (based on his first criteria) over his wife (me) who is only 28. (He claims moral superiority is awarded to the individual in the comparison group with the most years on earth, and then in the case of ties, by total body girth.)

In order to celebrate this momentous day, his blogs have been compiled into a lovely keepsake edition entitled Land of Yajeev: The Early Years. This keepsake edition chronicles Yajeev's journey for the past two years. The paper version of the electronic bliss Yajeev dreams up is extremely useful for those of you who may suffer from Yajeev withdrawal when the pilot prohibits the use of all electronic devices or when you find yourself without your laptop in a restroom. (In the latter case, I recommend the entries found on pages 13, 18, and 59.)






You can purchase your very own copy of Land of Yajeev: The Early Years at http://www.lulu.com/content/4905071.

Enjoy all Yajeev lovers!

Happy birthday, Yajeev!

My Pet Monkey

It has been awhile since blogging. It turns out that grad school is a little more time consuming than summer vacation.

I have had the privilege to work on a writing study, and I have been grading at least a hundred writing samples. One particularly awesome essay extolled the virtues of getting a pet monkey.

"I had a monkey and I loved him because he scratches my butt and it feels good."

The next time you are trying to decide which pet to bring home, remember this second grader's advice. Everyone needs a pet monkey.

It's DiGiornos!

My lovely husband is not that good in the kitchen. From the Valentine's dinner that was too spicy hot to eat and burnt cookies to the rubber glove pan fire of 2007, my husband has a way with destroying food, pans, and kitchen utensils. Tonight on my way home from a late class, I called him suggesting we go out to celebrate my first day of work/school. The husband stated that he had a lot of work to do, but he would put a pizza in the oven, providing for his starving wife.

We went over the instructions together. Yes, I normally put it on foil on a cookie sheet. No, I don't wait for the oven to preheat. No, 6-8 minutes doesn't seem like the right amount of time. Oh... 6-8 inches from the bottom, yes, that sounds better. 19-21 minutes to bake is probably accurate. By the end of this conversation I was sure I would have dinner waiting for me when I got home.

Well, I did have dinner. Unfortunately, I left out an early detail in the process, how to remove the pizza from the box. He forgot to remove the cardboard piece from under the pizza, so every slice was cooked onto the cardboard. After scraping, prying, and sawing, we finally had dinner ready to consume. It wasn't delivery.